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SPRING/SUMMER Magazine
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LOVE CONCERT
Featuring Dubmatique:
April 24
MUSIC: PHOENIX
All over it.

Secret# 1 Revealed! Fred: Kryptonite & Other Stuff
[photography: Adrien Baudet]

When I was 11, I was completely obsessed with a pair of Superman pajamas.
They were a soft, powder blue two-piece number with a great big Superman crest on the chest.
Whenever I’d wear ‘em I’d run around the house jumpin’ off furniture. They made me feel invincible. I got so hooked that I’d often sneak them out of the dirty laundry pile.

So what’s the real secret? In grade five there was this bully at school who always whammed the ball real hard at people when we played dodge ball — even at girls. One time he picked on my little sister and almost broke her glasses.
I got so pissed, you have no idea.
I can still picture my sis ballin’ her eyes out and him standin’ there all smug like he was proud of himself or somethin’.
Yeah, you’re real cool — you can make a girl cry. What a dumbass.
So the next day, I was ready.
Without anyone knowin’, I put on my pajama top under my sweater. I tucked it in real good to make sure it didn’t stick out anywhere.

Once I got to school I stormed onto the courtyard, fists clenched and cursin’ at him under my breath.
We faced off on the dodge ball court. I made sure to be the last one standin’ with him.
When he whipped the ball at my head, I jumped up and caught it.
By then a crowd had gathered and they all gasped — they knew how hard he slammed it.
Then it was my turn: I stared him down hard and, channelin’ my Super-pajama power, shot the ball at him with a mean spin.
He dropped it, his palms red from the force of the impact.
I nailed him good! The giddy crowd cheered me on while he walked away, eyes glued to the ground. He never picked on my lil sis again after that.

Eventually, though, I did get over my Superman pajama thing.
One day, out of the blue, I thought to myself: the guy’s wearin’ a flaming red cape and flyin’ through the air in pantyhose for Pete’s sake…. What’s up with that?